I have always had a certain fascination with quotes. Every once in a while I hear something said in such a way that it seems starkly profound, especially compared to the rest of the spoken words I hear on any given day. These quips are usually a fact or truth that I am already familiar with, but the way they are stated often makes all the difference.
Some people seem to have quotes in their pocket all the time. For example, citers of movie quotes — this is an irritating bunch when you are around two or more of them that are really in the zone together and you are not in that particular zone.
Star Wars nerds (I like Star Wars too) are always breaking out in various Star Wars characters, whether we like it or not. There’s the “May the Force be with you”, of course. And someone always gets their best bass vocals going and says, “No . . . I am your father” from Darth Vader. Although, I think I’ve actually said that last one to my children before.
There are trite quotes:
“Great spirits have always encountered opposition from mediocre minds.” — Albert Einstein
. . . and challenging quotes:
“Atheism is rather in the lip than in the heart of man.” — Sir Francis Bacon
. . . inspiring:
“Remember, the music is not in the piano” — Clement Mok
. . . practical:
What I’m looking for is a blessing that’s not in disguise. — Kitty O’Neill Collins
These are quotes from some of the greats. But great quotes can come from the most unexpected places. It seems to me that Country Western music lyrics and song titles are amazingly quotable. A few titles (actual ones) I found are:
“Her Teeth Were Stained, But Her Heart Was Pure”
“I’m So Miserable Without You, It’s Like Havin’ You Here”
“My Head Hurts, My Feet Stink, And I Don’t Love You”
OK, maybe these would only come in handy select social circumstances.
My mother popped a good one on me the other day. We were talking about the glories of leather seats in automobiles (in her opinion), and she said, “We like leather seats. You ever try to get out of one of those cloth seats? They rip your clothes right off!” Now that I think about it, it hasn’t happened to me. But, thanks to my mom, my eyes have been opened to the lurking violence that cloth has in store for us.
My children are always saying something that seems funny at the time, but I usually forget to write it down. They are usually “you had to be there” moments anyway.
Peyton (four) and Autumn (five) were sitting at the breakfast table having a conversation the other day. They were all serious and unaware that Mom was in the kitchen, pretending not to listen. The dog was barking up a storm next door (one of the joys of living in towns and cities) and Peyton was apparently bothered by it.
“If they don’t shut that dog off, I’m going to call the Harrup”, he said.
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| Autumn looked over at him with a wrinkled eyebrow and replied, “There’s no Harrup. It’s the Sherrup.”
“Oh, right, the Sherrup”, Peyton replied. And on they went with their day.
On yet another day, I’m walking down the hallway of our preschool with Peyton and one of our favorite teachers at the school when Peyton says to Miss Tina, “You have a big tummy”.
My eyes bulged and my lungs locked in shock. Miss Tina replied, “I know, I do don’t I?”
What a pleasant moment that was. Anything I might have said would have only made it worse, so I acted like I didn’t hear anything.
One of the teachers reported a kid quote where a preschool student said her parents had had a fight. The student reported that she overheard Mommy in the kitchen yelling at the husband, “If you fart in that bed one more time, you’re sleeping on the couch.”
The teacher, holding back laughter replied, “Oh, my”.
Kid’s are amazing.
There are some quotes I’d clearly like to forget (big tummy), while others I will never let someone live down (cloth violence).
The freak in me wants to combine these quotes into something new. For example, what if we gave Darth Vader a cloth light saber and had him meet the Sherrup at preschool for a showdown:
The Sherrup: “You have a big tummy”
Darth Vader: “No . . . I am your father”
The Sherrup: “My Head Hurts, My Feet Stink, And I Don’t Love You”
Darth Vader: “I’m So Miserable Without You, It’s Like Havin’ You Here”
Just then, Darth draws his cloth saber, but the cloth saber inadvertently rips his evil garb off . . .
I’ll stop.
I’ve been working on a 19 DVD project for the preschool and, consequently, I haven’t written much lately and I’m a little crazed. I would like to think that the end of the project would mean more time for writing, but life just keeps getting busier and this may be wishful thinking.
I’ll leave you with one final quote that applies to my life most of the time. I found it at United Hospital, 5th floor nurses station:
“Due to budgetary constraints, the light at the end of the tunnel will be shut off until further notice.”
That’s my report from the “Big City”.
Brian in the Big City
Employee #0090698
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